When you finally start letting yourself break and feel,you will feel like you are drowning. But you learned how to reach out and ask for help. Then you learned how to tread water,how to stand and flow with the waves as they crash into you and rebuild yourself. The more you learned how to appreciate and value the waves they became your friends rather than your enemy.

My surgery felt like such a clear description of the dichotomy of going from a family of disabled friends to a world of people that couldn't understand my existence. I had switched preschools the year before so I was technically in pre-k/kindergarten I was five years old and already felt alone

. But the feeling after the thought was what shocked me. The feeling of calm and acceptance, the feeling of your right you dont have the ability to do the activity. But this time the thought didn’t linger and it honestly felt like a weight off my shoulders.